baby goes to aruba!!!!

sweet.......

how cute is he....

breaks my heart

and melts it all at the same time

he has so much love

i just wanted to say........

i miss him......
i smelled him last night
in my dream
i miss him

no i didnt

i have not updated in a while
trying to stay away
from everything
out of site out of mind
yeah
i wish it worked that way
i did not go see aiden
i was sick to my stomach for the weeks before and now
i just feel like i have let him down
as i have many others in my life time and again
i just couldnt bring myself to touch him again
to go through that pain again
selfish?
yeah probably
i think of him more now than ever
wondering if he is clapping, sitting, crawling
wondering if he is wants my arms to hold him
the first hand that touched his...
it rips me apart daily
i hate this